Day 1 in isolation
At 9 this morning managers came in to take my phones, laptops, Amazon Fire TV stick, and my WIFI. Handing them over was oddly difficult, and for a split second I could back out of this experiment.
I was given a flip phone and a notepad. And then, they left, and it was quiet. I immediately took a nap.
In preparation for this week, I bought all my groceries in advance, a little more than usual just in case. I also got a few books to read and some extra cleaning supplies. Those are my “projects” for the week for when I get lonely and bored.
All I have really done throughout the day is sleep/eat/read/watch TV. It’s kind of relaxing, but my anxiety is still attached to my phones.
Every time my mind wanders, I want to reach for my phone to check my emails or check Twitter. I hear buzzing sounds, probably from my apartment cracking, and I think it’s my phone.
My sleep was a little odd in that every time I would wake up to check the time, I would reach for my phone, then realize it’s not there. I’m realizing how dependent I am. But it’s also freeing. I can sit and read without distraction.
I’ve also realized how dependent I am on my streaming services. Netflix is my number one go-to when I get home from work and want to relax. Now I watch day-time TV on the antenna.
It’s quiet here.
Right now, it still hasn't sunk in that I’m alone and will be for the next few days. We’ll see if I can do it.