KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — When an East Tennessee woman met her partner around a decade ago, she said she fell in love. She said there were no red flags, and she thought that the relationship would never involve violence or abuse.
WBIR chose not to name the woman in this story due to concerns of possible harm, should she be identified.
"Things you would never have thought would happen, happened," she said. "For the first year, it was completely normal. There were no red flags."
Until she got pregnant. That's when she started seeing things change.
She said several kinds of abuse started seeping into the relationship. She said incidents involving emotional and verbal started being more common. The McNabb Center said that's how most domestic abuse cases start.
"Many times, it's harder for individuals to recover from the emotional and psychological abuse that they endure," said Catherine Oaks with the McNabb Center.
The woman said once the abuse started becoming physical, she became afraid. She said she became so afraid that when the violence escalated and she had a chance to report it, she chose not to.
"I had an incident where I had officers come to me and ask if I wanted to make a report, and I told them, 'No,' because I didn't know what the backlash would be," she said.
It wasn't until several years later, that she decided to tell a friend about everything that had been happening. That was the first time she fully understood how bad the situation had gotten.
She said she started creating a plan to get away from her abuser. That plan included removing her nine-year-old daughter from the situation.
"When I finally decided to leave, I was scared. I left with the clothes that I had on, the clothes that my daughter had on, and a backpack," she said.
After leaving, the two found the McNabb Center. It provides services for survivors of abuse 24 hours per day, seven days per week. Their resources include emergency shelter, so the woman and her daughter were able to find a safe house and a safe community as they recovered.
McNabb also plugged them into legal services to file an order of protection, and pursue other forms of legal action.
"I can take her out and do things with her without looking over my shoulder. I can go to the park and just be at peace," she said.
That peace of mind is something she hadn't experienced in ten years.
"Today I'm thankful — one, that I'm still here. Two, that there are places like McNabb to help people like us," she said.
She said her main motivator for leaving was the well-being of her daughter.
"This journey has been to show my daughter that it's not okay for somebody to tell you they love you and treat you that way," she said.
Abuse can take many forms, and it is not okay no matter the kind of relationship a person has with their partner. Help is available for anyone who needs to escape abuse.
Anyone can call 865-637-8000 which connects callers to their local domestic violence hotline. People in Knoxville and East Tennessee can also reach out to the McNabb Center for help.