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"It is okay to not go" | Experts urge people to care for their mental health over the holidays

The holidays are usually thought of as a time of joy and wonder. But for many families, it can cause a lot of sadness, stress and grief.

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — It is okay to be sad during the holidays. The glimmering decorations may be beautiful, the food may smell great, and gifts may stack under the Christmas tree. And despite all that, it is okay to feel sad during the holidays.

They are usually advertised as the happiest time of the year. But for many people, the holidays can cause sadness, stress and grief for a variety of reasons. They may be mourning the loss of a loved one, or feel stress due to losing a job, or anything else.

Mental health experts are urging people to take care of themselves over the holidays. They said not everyone can be in the holiday spirit, and not everyone has to be. If people need it, they can simply choose to stay home for the holidays.

"The pandemic has taken a lot from us, but one thing that it has offered us is an amazing excuse to stay home. And also, it is okay to not go, really, just because you're not feeling it," said Dennis McLeod, a psychologist at Vanderbilt University.

Studies have shown that trying to prepare the perfect holiday meal or have the best decorations can create a lot of stress over the holidays. Just trying to be perfect during this time of year can cause people to burn out.

"A lot of times, people tend to forget the greatest gift — just to be present and how that looks with your family and your friends," said Julius Jefferies, a therapist in Knoxville. "The traditional belief is that you grieve the death of someone. in reality, you can grieve anything."

Other people may have to stretch their budgets during the holidays, buying gifts for loved ones and purchasing food for holiday meals. In a survey by Ellevest Magazine, 38% of women said they stress about spending money.

"The holidays are a time where you're expected to give a lot, expecting to get a lot," said McLeod. "But what if you don't have a lot?"

Most of all, experts said it is always okay to seek help if people feel overwhelmed with sadness, depression or anxiety. It can happen to anyone — even to people who usually enjoy being alone.

"You're no less of a person for taking care of your mental health," said ____.

The Tennessee Department of Health said that issues involving mental illness tend to increase during the holidays, leading to substance abuse or suicide.

It is never normal to have thoughts of suicide, and WBIR cares about anyone struggling with their mental health during the holidays. Suicide is preventable. It is not a solution to any problem, and we ask that if you need help, you reach to someone.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24 hours a day at 1-800-273-8255. People can also reach out to the Mental Health Association of East Tennessee Monday through Friday, 8:30 a.m. through 5 p.m., at 865-584-9125.

A list of mental health resources is also available here. Any of the phone numbers and links on that page will lead you to people who want to help.

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